Tag Archive: writing meta


30 Day OTP Challenge

So I find these challenge things on tumblr all of the damn time, right? Most of them I see and like the look of them but I never commit to actually doing them.

But I found THIS shipping challenge and I guess my brain needed a break from Gray Morning, because I’ve been cranking these out at about one a day for my own personal amusement and for quick words, since my son’s been sick (and now I am, too).

Of course, I decided on Savin/Mitchel for this particular challenge. And everything I’ve written so far has been post-Jazz’s death. So now I’m wondering if I’m inadvertently writing parts of the third book (tentatively titled “A New Day”), since the focus has been mostly on Savin and Mitchel’s developing understanding of one another. Now, I don’t think they’d ever be canon, but there might be an erm, unhealthy attraction/dependency almost on Savin’s end. One that Mitchel capitalizes on because he’s, well, Mitchel.

Either way, it’s been nice to focus on something other than Gray Morning. Even if this means I’m technically trying to figure out how A New Day even goes down. I honestly don’t really know how Gray Morning ends now, because of certain plot changes that have been made and subplots I’ve removed (because they were dumb). Jazz dying has always been a consistent fact. Jazz “cheating” on Savin is also pretty consistent, too, except this version will probably contain emotional infidelity more than anything else. Ravi was introduced at 25k in and that’s about as far as I got, honestly. xD

I kinda love his introduction, though. He’s always been an interesting character to write. He’s not my usual, and I really think I’m hung up on his fate, more than anything else. Because Mitchel needs a scapegoat. I’m pretty sure Ravi’s the fall guy.

And this is why discovery writing sometimes sucks. I am stuck, I think, partially because I have to just let them tell me the changes I need to make to their story. At the same time, I’m trying to keep them all tame, a bit, because I don’t want to lose sight of my plot.

Sigh.

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LJ Idol

In this kooky online writing competition I’m in, we have a deadline on Monday. I work third shift’s (midnight to 8am), have a small child with autism, and not a whole lot of free time as a result.

I’ve been kicking around this piece for the past three days. It’s heavily based on one of my novels. If I’m completely honest, it’s me, disguising the Gray Morning universe as much as possible, changing character names/titles etc so that it reads like it’s based in the US, and so that people might not have their eyes roll into the back of their heads.

Except my antagonist, Mitchel, is so clearly himself. The protagonist of the scene, Amelia, is clearly herself, as well, but in the book she’s a minor character; her role is huge, but her screen time is very understated. Mitchel? Well, he’s been the focus of an Idol piece or two, and how his actions and words have a huge impact on my novel’s protagonist, Savin. He’s been deconstructed in a piece or two of meta I’ve written for the competition, as well.

I don’t want people to recognize him, but I do. I don’t want people to go “Oh, she’s writing that *%$#)*% novel again,” and back out of the entry. Not to mention, the topics this go around (we had to pick one out of a group of 5) are so open-ended and up to interpretation, and the voters have been favoring the very literal, very close interpretations this season. For people like me who sometimes view the topics abstractly, it’s been a challenge boxing myself in, a little.

The basis of this piece? Mitchel is undergoing an interrogation for the murder of Jasper (Jazz) Callahan — except, of course, the names are changed. Jasper is the Emperor of their particular world; Mitchel is his second-in-command, in a way. So I changed it from their world to the US; Mitchel is Vice President, Jazz President. Amelia is head of the Secret Service and is doing the interrogation herself.

Mitchel’s motivations are varied. He wants power. He wants control. He believes that Jazz never should have been handed this position — that Jazz is effortlessly perfect (and here is my topic connection — Mitchel believes that Jazz is a man of “shibusa,” though if you know Jazz’s character, you realize this is just a projection on Mitchel’s part), and therefore, shouldn’t have it.

There’s also a jealousy component — Jazz fell in love with Savin and married him, and not Mitchel, who Jazz had known first, longer, and just as intimately.

But in the interrogation scene I’m writing, I’m essentially doing it from Mitchel’s POV. I am deep inside his head; using his syntax and his word choice and just general state of mind. He is in control. He is lethal. He believes he isn’t going to end up charged with anything, though he is under arrest.

And seeing outside of his very narrow view point (me me me) and his own perceptions of himself (I am perfect and great and smarter than the rest of the world) is so difficult, I’m having trouble seeing what will trip him up. Because Amelia will get him to falter. She WILL get that confession. And she WILL secure the ability to indict Mitchel for treason.

But getting it down on paper when I am so deep in Mitchel’s POV is difficult.

I guess this is why I don’t write in first person. It’s hard, working so close to a fictional person’s brain. And I’m not even writing in first! It’s in third! But to write like how he speaks, I have to strip away that extra layer of distance.

Characters, man.

NaNoWriMo

Is it November yet? I swear, these days just keep getting longer and longer…

I started my job very early Monday morning (12am). I did manage to write about 1350 words yesterday, despite that. This week is basically a test drive up until Friday, so I can figure out how the hell I’m gonna manage to watch my kid and write my words and get some sleep during November. 

I’m also heavily crushing on a writer-friend of mine I met through LJ. His words have always taken my breath away, and getting to know him a little better has made that a little worse. 🙂 So I have romance on the brain, just a little bit, which is making me want to write even more — but right now, I’m trying to relax and let my brain settle and maybe nap (I woke up early this morning in an effort to help keep me vaguely on a schedule for tonight — when I go back in at midnight…).

I want to embark on this journey with the final draft so bad. I know I’m not going to go much over 50k — I’ve been averaging that the past few months, and while I like to make NaNo a challenge for myself (and last year, challenged myself to 90k a month or a finished book — and surpassed both goals), adjusting to working a crazy life of third shift and just plain working again after three years of NOT working, I think 50k will be a bit of a tough feat.

But I WILL write every day, and I WILL push myself to at least achieve that goal. Writing is my life. It’s who I am; it’s how I breathe — and I can never, ever forget that. 

Technically…

I’ve only written 400 words today.

I had a job interview this morning during kiddo’s preschool hours. Got the job, do on-boarding tomorrow, probably start next week. Just in time for me to flail about uselessly during NaNo. I did win 2010 while working and going to school and dealing with a 1 year old, so I suspect I can manage it now. Except then I worked mostly 3-9pms, and I’ll likely be working 11p-7a. 

I’ll find a way to make it work. 😉 

Aside from that, I’ve been trying to figure out the story for Seize the Day. I know the main plot points — always have. But now that I’ve removed certain things that are really in a separate book, it makes the story that much less convoluted…and leaves me scratching my head. 

Biggest thing I came to terms with? Savin is the main character. I should have listened to him years ago. He always insisted he was. *sigh* But figuring out when he meets Jazz is…hard. Because it has to overlap with the end of Jazz’s relationship with Mitchel. I have a feeling Jazz wasn’t faithful for the last bit of it. He’s young, doesn’t exactly know how to end the relationship with Mitchel, etc. 

I always had this piece of information where Jazz and Savin originally had a one night stand but then didn’t pursue a further relationship for a little while after that. I don’t necessarily think that’s true anymore. 

Of course, now that I’m writing this blog post, I’m getting dialogue. A whispered conversation between Jazz and Savin after meeting each other again after their one night stand. It’s after Jazz’s father ended up as one of Savin’s surgical patients — and Savin didn’t realize who the hell Jazz was, when they slept together. I think he might also be there with Mitchel, who’s still obviously together with Jazz (I saw Savin seeing Mitchel have an arm around Jazz’s waist etc etc). 

Hm…. I will have to let this sit, and see where it goes in my head, I think. But now I have a vague idea of what the beginning is like. Hilariously enough, I have the middle and end of this book pretty clear in my head. Which is nice for me, as a pantser. 😉 

I guess I’m getting as close to ready for NaNo as I can be. 🙂

Ah, time to think of another title…

So this morning I decided I was going to work on the next piece of the Say What You Want series. This will definitely be the last piece. And I’m not entirely sure how it ends — though I suspect the characters will inform me soon, since I’m roughly 2.5k into this chunk already. I struggled a bit getting started, though.

I’ve been struggling again, in terms of writing, anyway. Once I get enough inertia, I’m good, but over the weekend it was a struggle to hit 750 words on Saturday and on Sunday I scraped together 300, with three separate 100 word drabbles. Life is hectic. I was out with the local high school marching band all day Saturday; the words I wrote were all written while I was on the bus. And they weren’t very good words, either. Oh well.

I still haven’t quiiite figured out things for Gray Morning, which I think is going to have a title change to Seize the Day. I don’t see it being a trilogy anymore — Ryin’s story and dropping aspects of the world that pertained mostly to him (Natural Borns, and the genetic engineering, etc) seemed to cut the overall story quite short. Which is fine — I don’t mind it. I prefer stand-alone novels, anyway.

I’m just undecided whether I want it to BE a stand alone novel, or if it should have a sequel — and if I did a sequel, what the sequel would actually BE about. But, I’m filling the pieces together. And I really, really want this to be my NaNo project. And then after I finish this book, I’ll move on to finishing Stellar. Once Stellar is finished, I’ll go back and edit Seize the Day. Or well, maybe not editing it, but reading through it, picking out which pieces need to be changed and making revision notes. It’ll be a bit tedious, but I want to go the traditional publishing route with these novels. Once I’m done with making notes for Seize the Day, I’ll do the same thing for Stellar. 

In the meantime, I’m also going to have to balance those projects and my erotica, not to mention the short stories I’ll also be attempting to get published. All while likely managing a part-time job on top of it all. It’s going to be work. It’s going to be tough. But I know I can do it, and I know that I’ll find a way to push through all of the obstacles that are in front of me. Writing is my passion. It’s what I really, truly want to do with my life, and I will make it work. 

I want my writing income to become my primary source of income. Of course, learning to balance the writing job and the part-time real world job and the childrearing job is going to be exceptionally difficult. But, I will find a system that works for me. The goal is 50k words a month from here on out. More is great! But that’s what I want out of me, minimum. In 75 minutes, I can write 2000-2500 words — that’s what I did today. So I need to set that aside every day. Or twice that, every other day. 

But enough rambling, here’s a piece of what I wrote this morning:

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